Divorce

     In my personal opinion, how the today’s world views marriage and divorce completely disgusts me. They see marriage more or less as a thing to do when it is most convenient for them and they could reap the most benefits like taxes and living. Then they file for a divorce when things become less convenient for them and walk away and wash their hands of the commitment they made so easily. In California there was a law called the No Fault Divorce which empowers any couple that is seeking a divorce to sign the papers and with no further action they are legally divorced in ten days. If only one person signs the divorce paper it takes twenty days for it to become official. As you can assume this No Fault Divorce law made getting a divorce a lot easier so in turn more and more people started filing for them. However, the stipulation that California did not take into account is divorce becomes a lot more complicated when there are children involved. So the state of California slowed the divorce process down to a waiting period of a month minimum and this small change saved a lot of marriages .This waiting period gave couples an amount of time to realize that they could work on their marriage instead of doing something so drastic and permanent like a divorce. I have been in a bad mood longer than a week, so if I was a Californian I would also take advantage of the opportunity to divorce my partner but would regret it a week later. Two years after a divorce seventy percent of men are remarried while twenty four percent of first marriages end in divorce. And what is really a staggering number is that sixty two percent of second marriages that involve children end in divorce. A study found that when the kids are around the age of 13-15 the father lives up to 400 miles away. That means that they are not nearly close enough to be a part or willing to be a part of their children’s lives. In a blended family it takes up to 2 years for the family to find their stride or a sense of normalcy. A family operates in the terms of years. Take for example the holidays, one year the family might go to one parent’s then go to the other parent’s the next year. After two year’s worth of holidays the kids and parents are more aware that their schedule is going to be oscillating between both parents. While just after one year the kids did not know whether the holidays were just going to be spent with this parent from now on or see the other parent next year. There are a lot of variables that a blended family needs to figure out and that can take years for them to find all the loose ends that they need to tie up. If you find yourselves in the position of the parent of a blended family there is some key advice I could give you is that just act like you are a fantastic aunt or uncle. Being a new part of the family, the kids can undermine your authority if you have any at all so just be there for them.I think marriage is something that is going to require an immense amount of work and is going to test your patience in ways that you did not think you could be tested. Divorce is a last ditch option apart from if the relationship is mentally or physically abusive. I think you could make the marriage work if the effort, motivation, and love is there on both sides.